I used to be so passionate. I had an opinion about everything. Dramatic opinions that I wouldn’t hesitate to tell anyone and everyone. And if I didn’t have anyone to yell at, I would journal for hours about the injustices I saw in my life. Not in the world, because I couldn’t see past my nose at the time, but things that happened in my own tiny little space.
Who Is God…
One of my favorite topics was God and religion. I used to write page after page in lighting fury over how hypocritical religion was but at the same time, how beautiful faith itself is. I have a love/hate relationship with God that I used to express with such intensity, but it, too, has cooled over the years.
Or the selfish drive of consumerism and how it’s wreaking havoc on the planet, not to mention ourselves. The curse of advertising and how it’s gotten so sneaky over time. Where it’s sole purpose is to make you feel bad so that you’ll buy the products they’re trying to sell.
This Big World
But now, I see things in a much broader scope, and they don’t move me as much as they used to. I can see that it’s a big world, and the little stuff just gets swallowed up, like it never really mattered (and some of it should). Like a pebble in the road that gets rolled over by the dirty and dusty wagon wheel of time. The wagon may bounce a bit but it keeps on going.
New Passions Arise
I still have opinions, obviously, but they don’t get me going like they used to anymore. Maybe that’s just the way things get when you’re older, maybe that’s what it means to be ‘wiser.’ I think it’s a little sad, but what can you do. You can’t ‘unknow’ something once you know it. What I’ve seen of the world has muted my passion. But there’s always change right around the corner, and I know that my renewed passion is only a written novel away.